One of the things that stops me blogging as often as I’d like (along with insufficient hours in the day, laziness and sleep deprivation to the point that I can’t actually formulate a coherent sentence – yes they’re 2 and a half, no they don’t sleep through 😬) is the fear that what I’m writing is nothing special. There are just so soooo many bloggers out there with something more interesting to say, or a better way of wording things or a cleverer writing style than me. I’m not saying that as one of those compliment-fishing things when you then want everyone to say ‘oh no you’re amazing’ etc etc – I just see it as a fact. The blogging market is positively saturated with talented writers, many of whom are charismatic or entertaining or hilarious or all three, or who lead a really interesting lifestyle, or who are experts in something they can dish out advice in – basically they have some sort of USP which makes them stand out and be unique. I, on the other hand, am a bit socially awkward (actually a lot but I’ve got better at hiding it 🤣). I’m not a trendy person – I don’t keep up with the latest fashions; in fact, most of my wardrobe is either threadbare crap that I’ve had since I was like sixteen or baggy shapeless entities bought post-babies to hide the mum tum. I certainly don’t have a glamorous, beautifully-styled Insta-friendly show-home – Instagram would recoil in horror at the sight of my spare room bursting with clutter or my poorly hoovered kitchen floor 🙈 I wouldn’t describe myself as especially funny or an amazing writer or an authority on any particular subject – at the moment, if I can name what day of the week it is, I’m impressed with myself 🙈 So on the face of it, I lead a pretty average sort of a life really 😊 Yes I have twins, but there are even squillions of amazing bloggers with those too! 😂 I would describe myself as normal. (I mean, with a bit of crazy thrown in, but everyone has that, deep down, right? 🤣)
Soooo… I have been thinking for a long time about starting a blog. I know *snore* everyone has a bloody blog these days, which is partly what’s put me off doing it. I’m not convinced anyone would read it, but I’m starting to think maybe that doesn’t matter and if noone does, it can just be a record for me to look back on which is the main reason I want to do it anyway! And if along the way even one mum might feel a bit better because she can relate to something I’ve said, then bonus! I’ve had plenty of moments reading other people’s blogs when I’ve thought ‘oh thank f**k someone else feels like that sometimes – maybe I’m not quite as batsh*t crazy as I thought!’ 🙊 It would be awesome to be able to do that for other mamas out there!
The main problem I think I will have is having the confidence to post what I want to say… I sometimes write long, slightly ranty posts on Instagram and half the time I end up deleting them because I start overthinking it. Eg – people are going to think I’m such a selfish cow whinging about trivial aspects of motherhood when there are so many who haven’t got/had that chance. A sentiment I totally get – a few years ago when I wasn’t sure if I was ever going to have the chance, I would have wanted to slap someone round the face for such whining and say ‘pull yourself together, don’t you know how lucky you are?!’ However, now that I understand the reality of just how HARD it can be, I now appreciate the need for a good rant and realise that some moments are just crappy, however much you know how lucky you are and actually it is healthy to talk about these feelings 🙊 Being naturally quite a shy person and a bit lacking in confidence, I’m nervous to open myself up to criticism or judgement from other mums but hopefully it won’t come to that and anyway that would require people to be reading it which I don’t think they will be so yay we’re all good 😂
So, I probably won’t post that regularly, just as and when things crop up. If you’ve read to the end of this, you deserve some kind of endurance medal 😂 I think I’ve successfully managed to bore even myself 😎 Oh and by the way this is NOT going to be one of those gorgeous perfect-looking blogs with pictures of cups of tea next to blossom and that sort of thing 😂 This is going to be very random, un-sugar-coated (not even a word, I mean come on! 🙈) and most likely full of swear words 😬 But honest 😊
‘Til next time!
PS In case you were even slightly interested in the name, we call Henry and Cora ‘Twiglets’ because they’re twins and also piglets 🐷🐷😂😂