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Since the lockdown rules were relaxed slightly, we haven’t really changed what we’ve been doing all that much. Still staying at home the vast majority of the time and just heading out for the odd local walk. But a couple of times we have tried going a little further afield and travelling by car to go for a walk. And to be honest, both times I’ve just found it really stressful and anxiety-inducing. I wrote a post before about how I’m feeling anxious about lockdown ending. And as lockdown starts to ease, I feel like the thing I’m struggling with the most is going out.

struggling with going out

Last weekend we headed out for a drive, with the intention of stopping off at some woodland somewhere for a walk. Only every single car park we went past was absolutely rammed. And I refused to even try to stop in any of them because they were just so busy. In the end we did manage to stop on the Downs not far from us, where it was very open and easy to keep our distance. We had a nice sit-down on the grass in the sunshine and the twigs had a good run-around, and it was lovely. In the end!

Anxiety about going out

My other half is a lot more relaxed than me about it all. Well, about most things to be fair, but definitely about this. He’s the one who’s been doing the weekly shopping for our family so I think he is just a lot more used to going out than me at the moment.

I just find my anxiety levels gradually rising as soon as I leave the safe bubble of our house at the moment. I’m not sure exactly sure why. None of us are classed as vulnerable. (I know that doesn’t necessarily mean you’d be protected from getting severely ill, but obviously the risk is much lower). It’s more about putting others at risk I think. If the rules were to change soon meaning that I could see my mum, I really wouldn’t want to have to delay that after it’s been such a long time.

I don’t know, I can’t explain why I feel so anxious going out really. It does stress me out that so many people seem to not be making any effort whatsoever with social distancing now though.

struggling with going out

What social distancing?

For example, the other evening we went to a big lake about a 45 minute drive from us. We deliberately went in the early evening for a picnic in the hope it would be quieter.

It wasn’t. It was absolutely packed. The car park was full and the surrounding roads were rammed so we had to park quite a way away. Then we had to walk along a fairly narrow path to get to the entrance. We were holding on tight to H and C and practically falling into a ditch as we tried to keep to the side as much as we could. Yet I swear not a single person even slightly moved over for us as we came towards them!

On the path around the lake it was much the same. Us desperately trying to steer ourselves around everyone and nobody else apparently giving a crap! I’m sure it isn’t the same everywhere but it literally felt like everybody had just gone back to normal, like nothing was even going on.

Am I being pathetic?

I do feel like I’m being a bit pathetic struggling so much with going out. It seems a bit ridiculous when there are plenty of people who’ve been going out to work throughout this whole lockdown period. To be fair, if I had been needed in school at any point, obviously I would have gone in without question. And I wonder if I’d actually be feeling less anxious in a way now, because it would feel a bit more normal to be going out?

I’m completely rambling now. But is it just me or is anyone else struggling like this with going out? I feel like we’re all going to need some kind of therapy when this is eventually all over, just to be reacquainted with society! I’m being flippant but seriously, I do wonder about the effects lockdown must be having on people’s mental health. Obviously it has to be done and is so important, but I feel for those with anxiety issues and so on.

I think it’s going to take a lot of people a while to readjust to society again. For now I think we will just carry on staying local, although even local parks still feel very busy!

Anyway thanks for reading what turned into a bit of a ramble!

Til next time,

Hannah xx

struggling with going out
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21 Comments

  1. Pingback: Walking During Lockdown (The Ordinary Moments) - Hannah and the Twiglets

  2. Hey Hannah,

    I read your blog and just wanted to let you know that you aren’t alone. Me and the hubby currently live in Austria (as you probably know from FB) and it’s been a really strange time. We’ve been isolating since about mid March, but recently the country’s been lifting the lockdown for a lot of restaurants and activities.

    It’s weird because even though I see the infection rates reducing, I worry a lot out on the street when people don’t give me space (I’m about 6.5 months pregnant, so I sometimes feel like everyone should try a bit harder) and I feel like I’m a bit over the top with the hand sanitizer! The hubby works from the office just one day a week but I always worry he’ll bring it home, even though he’s perfectly careful.

    I think maybe it’s just what most people feel, and sometimes I wonder if others are just extra blase about it because they’re scared too but don’t know how to handle it. I know everyone’s really keen for life to go back to normal, but I wonder if the world needs a bit of a reminder of how quickly this could potentially resurgent before the message really hits home, and there’s a chance they may end up learning that the hard way.

    I really, really hope not. :/

    Xxx

    • hannahandthetwiglets@outlook.com Reply

      Hi Jacky, lovely to hear from you and thanks for reading my post πŸ™‚ More importantly, CONGRATULATIONS! How exciting! Hope you’re doing good and feeling ok. Yes I definitely think a lot of people are being very blase – I don’t know what it’s like in Austria (I imagine people might be more sensible?!) but there’s a lot of knobs over here just not even bothering with lockdown it would seem! πŸ™ And the bloody government doesn’t help, but don’t get me started on them πŸ˜‰ Anyway, stay safe and keep cooking your little bubba – I look forward to seeing some news on FB πŸ™‚ Sending love xxxx

  3. You are entitled to your thoughts and feelings and are not pathetic. I have kept largely inside apart from exercise once a day most days and sometimes not even that. I have quite enjoyed unexpectedly having time and space to plan what to do with the rest of my life and to be looked after rather than looking after others for a change. I get anxious sometimes but then just remember to breathe and take each day as it comes. We will all work out our futures as the individuals we are. #StayClassyMama

    • hannahandthetwiglets@outlook.com Reply

      Yes, all so true πŸ™‚ That’s lovely you’re enjoying have more time to yourself πŸ™‚ xx

  4. I also wrote about this, this week. Our numbers are so low I know statistically I’m being a nut but I can’t help it and I’m not comfortable (and I never thought this would be me. It’s like I’ve aged a decade (probably become my actual age, truth be told) in the last 8 weeks. I did listen to a great webinar that I’ll share once it’s posted on Rafiki Mnewa’s website – she sort of explained why we were like this (more about how to deal with kids anxiety about going back to school but I could see it probably also applied to me). I think it’s okay to ease into it. And work out ways to feel safe (and more importantly be safe). Weirdly I think this is harder than going into lockdown (money impact aside). #StayClassyMama

    • hannahandthetwiglets@outlook.com Reply

      You can’t help the way you feel though – we all have to do what we feel is right and we’re comfortable with πŸ™‚ Yes it definitely seems to be moe tricky coming out of it than going in! xx

  5. Your definitely not the only one with these thoughts. It’s crazy how even though its not slackened much but people are taking advantage. Ignoring the social distancing. I feel exactly the same. Where we live in Scarborough. They have started closing the road off to the beach at weekends to prevent visitors.

    • hannahandthetwiglets@outlook.com Reply

      Oh gosh it’s scary isn’t it – some people seem to think it’s all over and they’re just fine to do whatever they want! Crazy!

  6. There certainly seems to be more people caring less about social distancing. We have started driving up onto Dartmoor for some exercise but I won’t go to the popular places because they are rammed. My husband does the shopping but that’s because he works at Tesco. At this moment in time I can’t imagine how I will ever go back to even semi normal. #StayClassyMama

    • hannahandthetwiglets@outlook.com Reply

      No me neither! I’m sure it will eventually but it’s definitely hard to imagine now! xx

  7. We are still making the most of all the local places we can walk to and luckily most people seem to be taking the social distancing very seriously. I am sure that this is not the case everywhere!
    #thatFridaylinky

    • hannahandthetwiglets@outlook.com Reply

      Ah that’s good – I find it a bit hit and miss round here with how seriously people are taking it now!

  8. It’s really daunting isn’t it?! We’ve all been shielding and I for one am in no rush to get back out there.
    We live on the canal in the countryside and everyone is coming here for walks and picnics. There is barely 1-metre distance when passing others on the towpath so no one is social distancing!
    The poor boaters can’t even get off their boats at times, with people hanging around. x

    • hannahandthetwiglets@outlook.com Reply

      Oh gosh what a nightmare! That’s really rubbish when it makes it hard for you to get out for a local walk. I think some places are busier than they’ve ever been by the sound of it – it’s crazy! πŸ™

  9. I reall don’t feel much anxiery about going out but maybe because we haven’t had many cases in our are and my husband and been working outside the home the whole time. I kept up my weekly shopping trips like normal and I know we are all pretty low risk too so my anxiety about catching Covid has never been that high. I often worry that me and my family might be causing others stress though as we don’t wear masks when out hiking or in outdoor spaces since we feel it’s easy enough to keep our distance.

    • hannahandthetwiglets@outlook.com Reply

      I’m sure you wouldn’t be – especially not in open outdoor spaces πŸ™‚ Hope you have a good week x

  10. You are not alone. I also feel this way. We have been pushed into not going out to stay home and safe and now we are allowed out but there isn’t really much to indicate that it is actually safe. Very hard to get your head round. I guess it will get easier as we go. Or at least I hope so. Thanks for sharing with #stayclassymama

    • hannahandthetwiglets@outlook.com Reply

      No exactly, especially for those who are shielding who’ve suddenly been told it’s ok to go out. Crazy times! Hope you’re having a good week xx

  11. I stayed completely indoors for the first 4-5 weeks a my asthma was bad. It was a really big deal the first time I left the house! This week we have been over to my parents’ to play in the garden but normality still seems a long way off. Thanks for linking up with #stayclassymama

    • hannahandthetwiglets@outlook.com Reply

      Ah that’s nice πŸ™‚ I can’t really trust my little boy to remember to stay distanced from my mum but we’re going to attempt a picnic this weekend – I’ll have to chain him to the picnic blanket haha! Normality does seem a long way off – you’re right. Hope you’re having a good week xx

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